TMI « Elle Dubya

Archive for the ‘TMI’ Category

Wintertime

Tuesday, February 16th, 2010

The building I work in is a large two story building that was quite contemporary in design when it was constructed in the late 70′s. Lots of brick and dark wood paneling that was thankfully torn out when the building underwent a major interior updating in the mid 90′s. What wasn’t replaced was all the brick – specifically the brick exterior walls. More specifically, the exterior brick wall that makes up for 1/4 of the ladies room perimeter. Set into this brick wall is the steel receptacle that houses the toilet paper rolls and a small trash bin.

There is no doubt in my mind that there is more brick on the other side of this trash bin, but my point here in laying out all this background is this: it’s drafty. Very drafty in there. And when the temperatures hover in the 30′s, it’s not only drafty, it’s extremely cold in there.

Did I happen to mention that the toilet is about 10 inches from the aforementioned drafty, cold, brick wall? Did I also happen to mention that I nearly froze my tush off this morning in there?

My greatest fear is that the only thing I’ll be able to do under such harsh conditions is produce peecicles.

It’s that cold in there.

Comments Off

Posted in Aaaah Crap, TMI, Workin' 9 To 5 |

Jekyll & Hyde

Monday, February 9th, 2009

I am happy being single. I love having my time to myself, to be able to go and do as I please. It’s incredibly liberating not to have to answer to anyone at home. I don’t have to check with a single person before replying to an invitation and I can invite whomever I wish to come over, whenever I darn well feel like it.

But every now and then, a long deep kiss would be nice. And maybe a boob grab too.

Comments Off

Posted in Hopes Dreams And Unicorns, Single Life, TMI |

Just A Little Bitter

Monday, November 3rd, 2008

I never realized how much toilet paper you used until after you left. I know that we would routinely go through 3-4 rolls in a week’s time. I just thought that the kids were using it as they would go in our bathroom just as much as their own. Turns out it WAS you. You seriously need to go see a doctor. I have counted – in the last week I have used less than one roll. And that includes 100% child usage as well since their toilet has been out of commission (until earlier today, thank you Mr. Landlord for coming over to fix!).

I’m finding myself getting used to, and quite enjoying, a lot of other “missing” things lately. Like the coating of partially dissolved protein shake mix that was always left to dry and cement in the bottom of the kitchen sink. Apparently turning on the faucet and rinsing was too foreign of a concept for you.

I also do not miss your underwear lying on the floors (yes, as in multiple rooms) or your keys thrown carelessly on top of my heirloom wooden jewelry chest (thanks for scratching it jerkface and then trying to say it was already damaged). Ditto on your lazy butt using my bath towel and then not hanging it up to dry, I totally love wiping off with a smelly, soured towel. *hoarf* You obviously knew that you were getting in the shower – would it have killed you to grab your own towel?

I can’t say that I’ve missed the house being dirty all the time either. It’s amazing how spending 5 minutes a day to pick up after yourself will do wonders for the place. The kids understand this concept (to a certain degree) and I don’t have a problem with it. But somehow, your genius level I.Q. 39 year old self can’t grasp it. Buh bye.

No, I don’t miss you and don’t sound all pissy when I confirm this to you every single time you ask me. The kids don’t miss you either. Oh wait – The Boy would like for you to put his basketball goal back together, the one you disassembled before a storm and then have let lay on the grass for the last three months. Preesh.

I especially enjoyed telling your friends at church today that you were gone. Oh and the one that’s known you for the last 25 years? Yeah, she didn’t really seem all that surprised. Go figure.

I hope you had a nice weekend on your bike at the beach. If the check you wrote me on Friday bounces, I’m selling your tools.

Comments Off

Posted in Aaaah Crap, Boys Are Stoopid, TMI |

The Dream

Friday, March 16th, 2007

I keep having this dream where I’m sitting on the beach at sunrise and as my knees are bent up where I am resting my chin on them, I have my right hand cupping a small pile of sand. I’m letting this sand slowly trickle through my fingers. I scoop up a handful and then watch it seep out. I scoop another and watch again. I do this over and over and over again.

But then the dream changes and I’m holding my last scoop of sand and in slow motion I can see every grain as it slips away. I’m watching it fall from my fingers only this time I’m trying to will the sand to stay in my hand. No matter how hard I try I can’t get my fingers to close in together and keep the sand from trickling away. No matter how bad I want to hold that sand in my hand…it keeps on falling.

Comments Off

Posted in Aaaah Crap, Boys Are Stoopid, Dating Games, Hopes Dreams And Unicorns, Rambling And Probably Drooling, Single Life, TMI |

Sacrifice

Tuesday, February 20th, 2007

Tip toe closer to the edge of sacrifice. What am I willing to give up in order to gain? I want “this”, but I have to give up “that”. I’m scared. If I give up, then I lose control. It terrifies me to let go of that control when I am not the only one that will be affected if I fail. Why do I settle for the safety of the minimum? It is what I can control. I have to be willing to step out on faith and make the sacrifice. Until then I have little room to complain about the status quo. I can’t shake my fist at the realities of life if I am unwilling to challenge that reality and change the course of my future.

My family.
My faith.
My purpose.
My career.

Where I am at now is not where I intended to be when asked about it six months ago. I want things to be settled yet I haven’t been willing to sacrifice what’s necessary to make that happen. My time – my efforts – my comfort zone. My pride. Ignoring the situation isn’t going to change anything and certainly isn’t going to make it go away. I am guilty of this as much as anyone else.

I wallow. Woe is me and come join me for my pity party.

I complain. Why does it have to be like this? I want it and I want it now!

I hide. I don’t have to participate if you can’t find me.

I act. The smile comes too easily, I am too practiced. If you could only see inside…

I am selfish about some things and I really don’t want to change. For so many years I gave, and I gave and I gave some more. I got nothing in return so I gave even further – in hopes that one day it would be acknowledged and maybe just once, in just a tiny amount, I would get back a morsel.

Comments Off

Posted in Rambling And Probably Drooling, TMI |