Archive for the ‘The Girl’ Category

Almost Home

Friday, June 22nd, 2012

It’s Friday night and the week is ending quietly.  The dishwasher is at a low hum as it battles a week’s worth of my mess riding solo while the kids were both away at camp.  Each of the Lil’ Dubya’s were off in different directions – The Boy at our favorite summer camp about an hour away and The Girl headed east with the youth from our church for an amazing week at the beach.  Some kids have all the luck.

I’m used to having weeks without them – they spend a week at a time with their dad at least once a month.  But even during those times, I get to see them on an almost daily basis for one reason or another.  Not like this week.  Not when they’re both completely out of town and out of arms reach.  It’s very different when the house is pin drop silent for days at a time.  I’m not much for watching t.v. so it stays super quiet around here.

But now they’re home. Well, one is anyway.  The Boy came home this afternoon and is currently snuggled up in my bed watching cartoons as we both wait for The Girl’s bus to arrive back from youth camp (90 minutes late, not that I’m counting).

The madness of having a house full of their joyful noise will return shortly as well.  With them comes this electricity in the air that I can’t duplicate with my own putterings around the house, no matter how many times I step on a cat’s tail or slam a cabinet door.

It’s different.  They make it different.

They make it home.

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Posted in Parenting, The Boy, The Girl |

Just Me & You, Kid

Friday, February 5th, 2010

The Girl is headed out later this afternoon to go camping with her Girl Scout troop so it looks like it’ll be just me and The Boy for the weekend.  I love it when I have large chunks of time to spend with just one of the kids while the other is away having fun on their own.  It lets me concentrate on that one little being and not feel guilty that I may be ignoring the other.

I’ll let him pick where we eat dinner tonight, almost certain that he will pick McDonald’s.  He’s growing up so fast and I know that the days where he’ll want to spend time with me hanging out and putzing around are going to soon run short.  But for now I’ll relish in his hugs and sticky face kisses.

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To Do List

Sunday, December 6th, 2009

Get through Gainesville Christmas Festival week

Survive Christmas

Survive getting the kids’ report cards

Get an oil change & maintenance for the van

Finish 9 loads of laundry

Prepare healthier meals.

Find a place to put drums for Rock Band

Prevent cat flatulence

Get ready for staycation the week after Christmas

Save $$ for safety patrol trip to DC

Save $$ to prepay summer day camp (discount!)

Saving $$ to pay for sleep-away camp

Save $$ for a down payment on a home

Find the right home

Get out of this apartment

Get into my size 10 jeans

Get more time in the gym

Figure out how to carry less in my purse

Figure out how to get the kids to listen the FIRST time.

Find missing shot records.

Fold 9 loads of laundry.

Spend more time doing nothing.

Re-learn song to sing in church in a few weeks.

Find black flats before Thursday night.

Go to bed before 10:30 p.m. 3 out of 5 weeknights.

Remember to pack a snack each school day for E-Dubya.

Remind J-Dubya to finish her homework.

Scoop the cat box.

Pray.

Schedule dentist appointment.

Schedule eye exam.

Finish book that was started 5 months ago.

Help plan Sunday School class Christmas party.

Email snack schedule to Sunday School members (don’t forget this time!)

Shave legs.

Decide whether or not to send Christmas cards, preferably before Dec. 22nd.

Pack bag for the gym in the morning.

Cuddle with E-Dubya.

Pass out from sheer exhaustion.

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Lesson Learned

Sunday, November 8th, 2009

lakestudy003I really didn’t know what to expect from this three-day camping trip with 130+ fifth graders.  I knew that we’d have plenty of chaperones, I knew that we’d be staying in indoor cabins (thank you God!), and I knew that we’d be outside 90% of the day.  Beyond that – it was a crap shoot.

The kids were bursting with excitement coming off the buses and scurried around like a bunch of ants as they searched for their sleeping bags and duffels in one of the largest piles of “stuff” I’ve ever seen.  It was interesting to see how prepared, or unprepared as the case may be, for three days away from home.  It was easy to spot those who have camped before: one small sleeping bag, one backpack, that’s it.  It was painfully obvious to see those who hadn’t: rolling suitcase, quilt or comforter stuffed in a garbage bag with a pillow slung across the top.

The girls in our cabin made quick work of setting up their bunks and making sure the beds were made just right.  They giggled and laughed as they explored the cabin and the deck off the back overlooking the lake.  Without any prodding, they began to pick up brooms (brooms!) that were kept in the cabins corner and started sweeping the floors.  The other chaperones and I joked that this type of spontaneous cleaning would never happen at home.

The trip was filled with hiking through the woods, afternoons by the lake and nights by fire making smores.  Each activity was a science lesson in disguise.  I was amazed at what all I learned myself during the week.

But the one thing that I learned wasn’t taught in the hard wood hammock or at the edge of the lake’s aquatic habitat.  I learned that I’ve done a pretty good job of raising my daughter to be an independent, confident, respectful young girl.  All week long I watched other children – boys and girls – stumble and flail around, lost without their parents, barely able to tend to their own basic needs.  I spoke about it with another mom on the trip and we both wanted to pat ourselves on the back for a job well done.

Does The Girl get lippy with me from time to time?  Yes.  Does she show a stubborn side of her that can only be attributed to her mother’s upbringing?  Most definitely yes.  But she made me proud this week at camp.  I got to see a side of her that I’m usually not around to witness.  The way she behaved with her friends and with the other chaperones, the way she took care of herself and her belongings, her personal responsibility as a whole – she was the complete package.

Yeah, I nearly broke my arm patting myself on the back.

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What Was I Thinking?

Sunday, November 1st, 2009

On Wednesday morning, The Girl leaves out for a three day camping trip with all the 5th graders at her school.  I, like the pure genius that I am, signed up to chaperone.  Shoot me.

As much as I would love to brag about being a pro at camping and all the assorted skills that accompany such a hobby, I can’t.  Because I am not.  It’s not that I’m opposed to the idea of camping.  Or bugs.  It’s just that I am severely deficient in camping experience. 

The first time I ever camped was over 23 years ago.  There was about 20 of us and we had paid guides that led us on a river rafting/kayaking trip where we camped overnight along the banks of the Nolichucky River near Poplar, NC.  Because it was a guided trip, we had very little work to do on our own with the setting up of tents and whatnot.  But still, I had fun.  A ton of fun actually.

The second (and last) time I ever went camping was when I was 20 years old.  A friend from work and I borrowed a tent and a couple of sleeping bags and decided we were going to go camp out at the primitive camp grounds at the beach.  We thought we were brilliant to pack frozen chicken breasts in Italian dressing to thaw and marinate at the same time while we drove out there and set up the tent.  Oh, did I mention it was dark when we got to the camp site?  Or that we had never laid eyes on the borrowed tent before that night?  Comedy in action – that’s what we were as we struggled to get that tent set up by the head lights of our vehicle.  At least the chicken tasted good coming off the grill.

So now we find ourselves, woefully unprepared yet again and about to venture out with 150 5th graders.  My saving grace this time is that we will be in cabins at a well known kids summer camp facility.  The Girl spent a week there this past summer and had a blast.  She’s been looking forward to this 5th grade trip for the past three years.  It’s a rite of passage of sorts. 

Truth be told I’m glad to be going.  Glad to be able to spend this time with The Girl.  Sure, we’ll be surrounded by dozens of other children all week, but it’ll still be quality mother/daughter time.  We’re laying out our sleeping bags and bug spray, blankets and sunscreen too.  It’s Florida after all. 

Hopefully my next entry will be filled with good tales of adventure and fantastic fun.  Wish us luck!

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I Miss Them Most

Thursday, August 27th, 2009

When it’s the first day of school.   When he gets a boo boo.  When she wants to talk for hours and hours.  When he wants to say his nightly prayers.  When there are cupcakes to be frosted.  When a new movie shows up from Netflix.  When I really need a hug.  When the house is clean.  When I’m anxious to go to the pool.  When there are fresh bagels in the house and a block of cream cheese with no finger prints on it.  When ice cream is on sale, buy one get one free.  When I’ve had a r0ugh day.

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Mark It Off

Sunday, July 12th, 2009

rainCross it off my list.  Because tonight, I danced in the rain.

The kids were down the street playing with friends and I had been cutting grass in the back yard when I felt the first droplets.  I was able to move the mower under cover just as the proverbial bottom fell out of the huge black cloud directly above my house.  I walked around to the front yard to greet the kids as they ran home to take cover in the garage.  We put the various assortment of skateboards and scooters away and then sought refuge inside where it was dry.

The Boy went to his room to watch some television as The Girl and I stepped back out onto the front porch to watch the rain.  There was no gradual build up of puddles and streams of water – the rain was coming down so hard and so fast, the streets were already beginning to flood.  The rain ran over the edge of the roof creating a curtain of water for The Girl to reach out and tickle with her fingertips.  She began to cup handfuls of the runoff water to fling back at me as we both shrieked in laughter. 

She mostly expected me to scold her, “stop that!”  What she didn’t expect was for me to wrap my arms around her in a bear hug and drag her out to the middle of the front lawn to play in the rain.  We ran to the front door to holler for The Boy to join us.  A brief moment of confusion crossed over him before he realized we were seriously playing in.the.rain. 

We sang and we danced.  We laughed and we splashed.  We joined hands and spun in circles.  We lifted our faces to the sky and caught raindrops on our tongues.  And we wrapped it up with a group hug.  Tonight, we created a memory.

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Posted in Parenting, The Boy, The Girl |

Calm Waters

Sunday, June 21st, 2009

Crescent Beach, FLWe spent the day at the beach building multi-level sand castles from empty cookie-dough tubs and plastic take home cups from our favorite small town bar-b-que joint.  The sun was hot but the breeze kept the air comfortable.  I laid on my chaise for a few moments watching the kids play near the edge of the Atlantic Ocean before they began to beg me to join them.  They’re allowed to go deeper into the water if I am there to hold their hands.

We stood side by side, our fingers intertwined, waiting on each roll of the tide to pass us by and we would lift our feet off the floor of the ocean so that the swell of the water would raise us up.  I remember looking at my children laughing in the sunshine, sputtering mouthfuls of salt water with each passing wave and in that exact moment, couldn’t find fault with a single thing in my life.

There is no perfection and yet there is abundance.  Do we go without?  Yes.  Do we have our struggles?  Most certainly.  But we are blessed beyond compare.  So many families face hard times and turmoil these days.  Brokenness and conflict fill their days and terrorize their nights.  I am so thankful to God for the things that I have – my faith, my children, my family and friends, my church home, my career.  These are the important things.

I saw the waves that day as reminders of hurts and troubles from my own past that tried to drown me.  And with each sputtering mouthfull, I stood back up to face another wave.  I have hopes and dreams just like everyone does.  My wish list of “maybe one day’s” is as long as the next persons.  But standing there in the water with my children, watching those waves pass us by, I had it all in the palm of my hands.

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Choices

Monday, January 19th, 2009
It’s all about the choices that we make. Turn left, turn right, stop or back up. There’s got to be something inside of us guiding our next move. I’m quite happy and content right now. The house is quiet as I am alone for the next week while the kids are with their Dadda. The silence is welcomed and I remember once again how much I enjoy this.

This. This, being single. Being alone. Being the only grown up in the house with no one to answer to. It’s by choice that I am alone. And it is by choice that I wish to stay this way. My 37 year old self is very confident in this choice. Will my 40 year old self feel the same way?

I keep thinking that the older I get, the wiser my decision making skills will become. Then I scoff at that thought because I look back at the choices I’ve made over the past three years and wonder what on Earth I was thinking. Those I chose to leave. Those I chose to embrace. Those that will haunt me when I let my guard down.

My choices were flawed in one way or the other. Do I feel better equipped now? Yes, I do. I feel as if I’m on a path with a perfect compass in my hand. I’m still searching for the next experience or the next task before me. Only this time my filter is different. I may not know exactly what I’m supposed to do, but I believe with all that I am, that I will be able to discern what I’m *not* supposed to be doing.

God’s will for my life is never clearly presented with a full set of instructions and guidelines. But what He doesn’t want for me is very clear. If only I choose to acknowledge and follow.

What happens if I stumble across a man who is like minded? One who is also searching? Just the thought of that makes me sigh heavily.

The Girl will ask me impossible questions sometimes. She wonders about the most remote possibilities and wants definitive answers to the “what if” questions in life. I shake my head in frustration sometimes because while I can’t ever imagine some of those scenarios coming to life, she can. In her mind if she can think it up then it’s a possibility. Is this how God sees us sometimes? Does He shake His head in amazement at the far out impossibilities we come up with?

I have to trust in Him. I want to. I have to. I do.

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Digitized

Saturday, January 17th, 2009
I was fumbling through a closet earlier this evening looking for the cord to an old radio when I came across several packets of pictures developed from film. I sat down in the hallway in front of the open closet, cords scattered all around me, and began flipping through the prints.

In the years before digital cameras, and especially when I lived 500 miles from home, I took pictures on my old film camera constantly. With a new baby and grandparents no where nearby, I was expected to document The Girl’s early days. As soon as I’d fill up a roll I would race to the drug store or megamart to have them developed; duplicates were mandatory. Half would be split between family members and the other half would be put in a box of other picture envelopes waiting to be put in a photo album.

I was much better at taking and having pictures developed than I ever was at putting them in albums. Stacks and stacks of pictures would collect before I’d run out for a few three-inch photo binders to store them it. The chore was tedious. I had the child in front of me – what did I need to make an album for only to have it sit on a shelf and collect dust?

Nine years later I stumble upon the last of the envelopes that never made it to an album. Envelopes that were packed up and moved four states away to sit in yet another box, doomed never to grace the pages of a plastic film covered sheet. Nine years later and I’m sitting on the floor smiling from ear to ear at pictures of The Girl dressed up in play clothes, tiara fixed just so, septor in hand. Nine years later and wondering where all the pictures of The Boy are.

Actually I know exactly were the vast majority of them are: still on the computer having never been printed at all. My first digital camera was obtained shortly after his birth. His life has been documented in pixels and jpegs but not too many 4×6 prints. He asked me once after looking through one of The Girls albums, “where are my pictures?” I laughed at the thought then pointed to the computer, “in there Bubba.”

Photo book-making websites are all the rage now. Upload, sort, decorate, border, caption, and voila – a printed photo album is waiting to be shipped to you. As much as I used to avoid putting prints in a three-ring album, I’ve avoided making a photo book for The Boy.

The kids are gone for the next week at their Dadda’s house. Quite alone time is something I will have in abundance until they return on Friday. I need to make this a priority to complete. He needs his own picture book. Lord knows I have a thousand pictures of him.

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