Archive for May, 2006

In Search Of Sanctuary

Monday, May 15th, 2006

In my sanctuary, I will find a place I have never been to before but long to find one day. I have always dreamed of leaving this life behind me and moving to a spot in the country. I can’t imagine that I would be able to care for more than 10 acres on my own so I believe that would be the perfect size for me and my children to roam. Just outside of town, not too far from school, work, church, shopping – you know – the necessities in life. But far enough that a trip into town is planned, never done on the spur of the moment. Far enough that visitors stay for hours rather than minutes, and you can hear their car approach long before you see their faces. Rural enough to say “we live in the country,” but advanced enough to have broadband access (is this possible?).

In my sanctuary, I will live in a small house, settled between the center and the back of the property. There should be enough trees to climb in, hide behind, and string a hammock between. Enough cleared land to run free and chase the rabbits and squirrels that call our sanctuary their home too. A tire swing will hand from a large oak tree to the back of the house. I can see it from the kitchen window and will watch the farm pixies take turns swinging from it while I fix supper. This small house will be old but solidly built, the windows large and plentiful, they’ll be thrown open every warm day that is presented to us as a gift. We’ll feel the warm breezes and smell the clean air as it passes us from one end of the house to the other. Not too big, this house will have just enough space for the necessities. Everything will have it’s own place and the little farm pixies will always keep their rooms neat and tidy (hey, I’m dreaming here right?).

In my sanctuary, I will teach my children about God, family, country, and life. They will join other farm pixies in a small church down the road. They will memorize bible verses and sing songs from the small wood railed alter. My children will learn in a community school house with the other farm pixies that live down the road and go to the same church as we do. My children will learn from their Momma how to behave, how to love, how to contribute and how to pray. They will not learn this from a faceless stranger in a classroom of faceless pupils.

In my sanctuary, I will come home to my farm pixies every night and be greeted to warm kisses and teddy bear hugs. Momma is there to take care of you now, sunshine. I will help them with their homework, play with them outside, fix them their supper, help them with their bath, and love on them before tucking them soundly into bed.

In my sanctuary, I will be ready for my soul mate. We will be free to be together and will never look to the past, except to learn from it. We will spend our nights wrapped up tight in blankets, holding on to each other and whispering our hopes and dreams to one another in the dark. We will love each other with mutual respect, mutual kindness, and mutual passion. We will lock the bedroom door each night.

In my sanctuary, I will finally be home. I will not desire to leave. I will not want to change anything or anyone, myself especially. I will be content and filled with peace. My children will grow up happy and loved and I will grow old with the love of my life.

Comments Off