I keep having this dream where I’m sitting on the beach at sunrise and as my knees are bent up where I am resting my chin on them, I have my right hand cupping a small pile of sand. I’m letting this sand slowly trickle through my fingers. I scoop up a handful and then watch it seep out. I scoop another and watch again. I do this over and over and over again.
But then the dream changes and I’m holding my last scoop of sand and in slow motion I can see every grain as it slips away. I’m watching it fall from my fingers only this time I’m trying to will the sand to stay in my hand. No matter how hard I try I can’t get my fingers to close in together and keep the sand from trickling away. No matter how bad I want to hold that sand in my hand…it keeps on falling.